I don't mind at all. I told the standard wt lies. I tried to argue that it was never proven that a jw died from lack of blood transfusion. I tried to show that all that was needed was a volume expander like saline solution, and that there were enough red cells to keep the jw alive if the volume was up. I argued that the body continuoussly prduces red cells.
I argued that when john1:1 says that jesus was god, it didn't really mean what it said.
I argued that when jesus said that he would raise his body that they killed, back up after three days, that he didn't really mean his physical body.
I argued that when somebody was dfd, it was their own fault for deliberately doing something like smoking, sex, disagreeing w the wt.
I remember preaching to the other kids in school that the end would come in 1975, or there abouts. I remember someone saying to me that he would like to talk to me in 1976, to show me i was wrong.
I hardly ever was able to live a perfect jw life. Yet i preached to others that they should become jws. This was especially so when i was in my teens. Back then i used to drink and sometimes attempt to get to know non-jw girls. For a while i smoked. Masterbation was something i was guilty of all the time, except for about 5 yrs, during which time i managed to stop, but i develped an ulcer.
I was depressed most of the time. Yet we were told that we were the happiest people on earth. I was on antidepressant meds twice.
Really, i think i am more honest now. I have more integrity now. That means i'm more together. I know more what i am, and can accept what i am. I don't have to pretend. I don't need to deny what i am. That's integrity. When i look back at my life as a jw, it was a sad pantomime. But that's okay, because it was part of growing.
SS